Microsoft To Exit the Zune Business? 361
thefickler writes "According to Microsoft's quarterly filings to the Securities and Exchange Commission, the Zune platform experienced a revenue drop of 54 percent, or $100 million. This compares to relatively healthy sales of the iPod, which were up 3 percent in the same period (though revenue did drop by 16 percent). Obviously, with the recent job cuts at Microsoft's Entertainment and Devices Division, pundits are wondering how soon until the Zune also gets the chop. As one pundit wrote: 'Microsoft, by now, should be realizing that it's never going to be as "cool" as Apple, so why waste its time with the Zune where it has no competitive advantage?'"
What really runined it was... (Score:5, Funny)
Steve Ballmer saying "squirt".
Heckuva marketing slogan, that one.
wheres (Score:5, Funny)
the "suddenoutbeakofcommonsense" tag
Wrong approach... (Score:5, Funny)
Just rename it the iZune, eZune, or better yet, the ieZune...slap a Vista Capable sticker on it and it can't help selling like hotcakes!
*crickets chirping*
Well, then again, maybe not.
No-one will miss it...? (Score:5, Funny)
Nobody except this guy:
http://sydfish.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/zune-tattoo.jpg [wordpress.com]
Oh, now I see why it failed...
Microsoft UK launches Zune MusicTurd(tm) service (Score:3, Funny)
In a bid to win back profits after huge layoffs worldwide, Microsoft UK has launched Zune MusicTurd(tm) [today.com] for mobile phones.
The highly competitive music store offers tracks at twice the price, DRM-locked to a chosen individual ear of the purchaser. If they can get it to work with their phone. Microsoft were careful to point out to the financial press that charging your account, however, works perfectly and that the helpline number has been connected to a fax machine.
Microsoft is confident the MusicTurd(tm) service will attract millions of people who will buy tracks from them to play on one mobile ever, not transferable to any other device including the same phone's replacement, in preference to stores offering cheaper unlocked MP3s, and won't just drive people to filesharing networks, MP3 blogs or copying 500 gigabyte USB disks full of music from their friends in sheer disgust at these corporate tools.
"We understand that lots of people use telephones they carry around with them these days," said Hugh Griffiths, Microsoft UK head of Mobile, "and you can even play music on them. A bit like a transistor radio. Whatever will they think of next! So if we get the consumer interest, we'll offer an enhanced version, MusicTurd(tm) Polished(tm). Like we're doing with Windows 7. You can't expect it to be any good until the third version, of course. So buy the first two and it'll be fantastic. Trust us on this. We have hundreds of loyal suck, er, customers on the MSN website, I'm sure we can squeeze them until the pips rattle.
"What do you mean, I'm lacking enthusiasm for our product? You'd think I was trying to get redundancy in the next round of layoffs or something. Ha! Ha! What a ridiculous notion."
[Read the original interview [pcpro.co.uk]. Least enthusiastic marketer in history. It was quite hard to outdo.]
[Oh, and have a Zune-Anus logo [today.com].]
Re:wheres (Score:5, Funny)
everyone misspelled it
Re:Had to remind myself what a Zune looked like. U (Score:5, Funny)
Apple exiting iPod classic market (Score:4, Funny)
Seriously, I've been amazed at watching the ipod over the years. They came up at 40 gig and it was quite remarkable. I bought an 80 gig model about 2 years ago when they had introduced those. But now you go to the stores and it's hard to buy a classic. They are pushing the nano.
That's usually the first sign of a product hitting it's peak in the business cycle. When they stop caring about the consumer, and start pushing the models which have the highest profit.
If I were MS, I'd stay in this market. Apple hasn't changed the ipod fundamentally since they introduced the color screen and videos.
Obligatory Bad Pun Thread (Score:3, Funny)
"Gee, gone so zune?"
Steve Jobs CNBC comment on Zune (Score:1, Funny)
Maria Bartaromo once pressed Jobs in a post-rollout interview on some of the iPods about the looming threat from Microsoft Zune, apparently forgetting who she was talking to (or possibly just knowing his celebrity without realizing it had nothing to do with fashion). His response was instantaneous as he responded "I don't know what you are talking about? Do you even KNOW anybody who has a Zune?" Maria, a fast talking New Yorker, was flabbergasted and after stumbling for words (rare) acknowledged that no she didn't. As they closed the segment, the anchors continued repeating to each other like bobble-heads "no, I don't know anyone ha, ha hahhh who has a Zune". It was classic.
Re:Wrong approach... (Score:3, Funny)
It's like they took the "Microsoft Designs the iPod Packaging" [google.com] parody as an actual how to.
Re:this comes as no surprise... (Score:3, Funny)
That's a reasonable and well thought out approach to the issue of DRM.
Hold on...reasonable and well thought out? What are you doing on Slashdot?
Re:Mac Business Unit Hiding Xbox Losses (Score:3, Funny)
1) Sunk cost. No one cares right now.
2) First I heard of this. A quick search turns up nothing outside of general managers moving from the Mac unit to the XBox unit
3) You've never dealt with the Atari 7200, or the PS2.
4) The only people who care are PS fanboys who don't pay the fee. Strange, really.
5) You're probably still talking about the XBox.
Finally, your point that if you take away profitable parts of the E&D division, you end up with a loss.... uh, really? I would have never thought that.
Get out of your basement and smell the coffee. MS doesn't care what the XBox used to be like; only that it represents MS (and Sony's) wet dream: a fully locked down and controlled hardware in the center of your living room. Both Sony and MS will stand behind the XBox and the PS until either one goes bankrupt.
Re:wheres (Score:3, Funny)
Well thank god the story tag is still there. Otherwise how would I ever know?!
Re:Could try "Windows7 capable" (Score:3, Funny)
Erase the bottom of the Z with whiteout.
7une.
Re:I used to be just like you. (Score:5, Funny)
...I haven't touched Pocket IE in a very long time.
Neither has Microsoft.
Windows 7 = cool (Score:5, Funny)
Success aside, the "coolness" of this OS could lead to a rise in the number of MS fanbois (yes they do exist). This, combined with MS's newfound "coolness" (assuming it persists), could just breath new life into their Joe Sixpack consumer products like the Zune.
Re:Windows 7 = cool (Score:1, Funny)
Am...I still on slashdot?