WiiHelms Go on Sale

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eldavojohn writes "ThinkGeek (Owned by same parent corporation as Slashdot) has recently started selling WiiHelms which allows the user to effortlessly play the Wii without tirelessly moving their arms around. An added foot pedal controls the A, B button pushing to minimize activity. According to the article, "After extensive scientific study it was found that manipulating muscles in your neck for 10 minutes uses 64% less energy than waving your arms about like a lunatic." Indeed, after watching the demonstration video, I myself will order four or five — I'm sick of flailing my arms around like a chump. Don't forget to check out ThinkGeek's other offerings today including inhalable caffeine sticks, the 8-bit tie and the most amazing T-shirt ever."

Doh!

[kd5ujz]

I wake up with a raging hangover to see this.
First thing that came to mind was "what will these lazy motherfuckers come up with next", then I remembered to check the date. Doh!

Re:

[akova]

I'm getting one for my girlfriend, AMIRITE!? Oh wait, this is slashdot. Nevermind.

Piranhaz with frickin' laser beams??

[What the Frag]

Piranhaz? That's an April fool.

Remember: You'll actually get Sharks with frickin' laser beams when you order those:
http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/rcbattlefish.sht ml [thinkgeek.com]

Re: Piranhaz with frickin' laser beams??

[Alwin Henseler]

Remember: You'll actually get Sharks with frickin' laser beams when you order those

Also remember: the delivery address need not be your own...

safety

[Hennell]

But are the helmets tested or will they fly off and break your tvs?

Re:safety

[HexRei]

just remember to wear the adjustable sliding-knot neckstrap!

Re:

[smaddox]

The first batch had trouble, but with they second, they decided to replace the yarn strap with the carbon nanotube strap used for the space elevator. Thats right, now someone with a head 1 mile around can still strap the helmet on.

How absurd

[linvir]

This idea is doomed to fail from the beginning. What a fucking crock. For one, the entire point of the Nintendo Wii is that you move your arms around. The entire point. It's intended for grannies and moms who wouldn't normally be interested, so they pick up the remote and it's just like controlling the television for them. How anybody can not get this is just beyond me. And secondly, all this overuse of neck muscles is going to lead to two things: sore necks and lawsuits. That's right, these chumps are going to get their asses handed to them in court when this thing hits the mass market.

It's not even as if this hasn't happened before! Anybody remember the Nintendo VirtualBoy? That VR piece of shit that killed a couple of people and left about a dozen blind in one eye? It was the same thing with that: it was going to make it easier to control games, just by creating some stupid helmet. My brother actually got one of those for Christmas the year they came out. Of course, he was really stoked when he saw it, because hey, VIRTUAL REALITY and all that. So he rips the box apart, quickly figures out how to put it on and get it working, and there, he's off. He was just starting to play, when suddenly to my surprise he did the mash. He did the monster mash. The monster mash. It was a graveyard smash. He did the mash. It caught on in a flash. The monster mash. He did the monster mash.

Re:

[tekkguy]

Wow, dude ... just ... wow.

Re:

[linvir]

1. April Fools Moron.
2. Welcome to the jungle, motherfucker

Re:

[HexRei]

try RTFEOTA (yes, thats read the fuckin end of the article)

Re:

[alisson]

Do you hear that? That "whooshing" noise? That's the joke, whizzing past your head.

Re:

[Virak]

Hahaha oh wow.

Funniest post I've seen today.

Re:

[buswolley]

Bravo!

Re:

[Toxicgonzo]

"when suddenly to my surprise he did the mash. He did the monster mash. The monster mash"

I first read that as " when suddenly to my surprise he did the smash. He did the monster smash. The monster smash"
and I was thinking, "If I got a virtualboy for Christmas I would have done the same thing."

absurd as wheelchair

[zorn169]

To someone with wrist problems that is. Real fscking funny.

Re:

[Jerf]

I salute you, sir!

I WANT THE TIE!

[bussdriver]

TIE [thinkgeek.com]http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/8-bit-tie.shtml [thinkgeek.com]

Re:

[Cedric Tsui]

The thinkgeek website indicates that people should stop e-mailing them about making this tie a real product and that they promise to do so.

So your wish will come true!!!

aw man...

[physicsboy500]

you still have to move your foot?!? I'm way too lazy for that. They just need to come out with Wii games that play themselves for me!

Re:

[hkmarks]

This, then, is the game for you. [progressquest.com]

Yay

[Colin Smith]

Geeks will again be able to play games without losing weight or gaining muscle tone. The geek world has been saved.
 

elk

[dances with elks]

So.... free karma you say

Re:

[Dripdry]

I should be modded Insightful for no reason whatsoever. Oddly enough, the word I just put to post this was "baseless"

well...

[Kryptonian Jor-El]

Let me be the first to say that this thing is a bitch to try to play Zelda with...

who cares about wiimote straps breaking when you could get whiplash trying to perform a helm splitter...

Re:

[bumby]

You ment to say "wiiplash" right?

Re:

[Scarletdown]

You ment to say "wiiplash" right?

And that would be followed by the Wiihelm scream [wikipedia.org] as you thrash about in agony. Correct?

8 Bit-Tie

[PixelSmack]

Ok how many people actually want one of those.... so just me then...

Re:

[lavid]

I was about to ask if my roommate and I were the only ones. Guess not. It would go well with a "know your roots" shirt or something.

Re:8 Bit-Tie

[DarkOx]

I saw the 8-bit tie, I sure wish that was real. I think it would be lots of fun at LAN parties.

Re:

[repvik]

The tie and t-shirt are the only items on thinkgeeks frontpage that actually earns you points. That leads me to believe that those are infact actual, real, non-april-fools items.

Re:

[hggs]

Hell, I want one of those 8-bit ties just to show 'em off to my other geek friends, even if they are clip-ons.

Re:8 Bit-Tie

[MeanMF]

Sign me up for a preorder!

Re:

[Anonymous Coward]

I would definitely buy one. If that really is only a joke, I think they might be missing out on a good seller, here...

Re:

[autocracy]

Yeah, this would totally sell if they actually made it. I like the "1982" availability date.

Re:

[jcarkeys]

I want one too.

Who wants to start a petition for ThinkGeek to start making them?

Re:

[samwichse]

Seriously, ThinkGeek. Make. The. Damn. Tie.

I'd buy one right now if I could. It's not like this tie is some kind of major stretch of technology or something.

Sam

Re:

[JonXP]

I can imagine that there is a ton of demand for this non-existent product right now.

I want one so badly...

Re:

[mackyrae]

If I was a boy, I'd buy it. Or maybe since I'm a girl, I'd buy it for my boyfriend.

Alarm Clock

[levell]

I could take or leave the tie but if they made an actual version of that alarm clock that donated money to an organisation of your choosing if you snoozed I'd consider getting one. (Only if I thought it was secure etc...but still - it would be cool)

Re:

[UTPinky]

Who cares if its insecure. That's just more of an incentive not to snooze.

Re:

[Llarian]

I do, I do! I don't even wear ties, but I'd buy it just in case I needed to go to a funeral or something else formal.

I bet it would be a hit at weddings too.

Re:

[Trogre]

That's exactly what I thought. I really want one!

Re:8 Bit-Tie

[loconet]

It's not just you. As a matter a fact, so many people actually liked the idea that after hundreds of e-mails, Thinkgeek has decided to start making them.

From the site:

"Hey! You! Quit emailing us to make this for REAL already ;) We promise, we'll make it. In fact we are already working on it. You've just forced our hand! Click the 'email me when available' link above to get notified! Thanks! I guess the joke is on us this year :p"

Re:

[Magada]

Fsck the 8-bit tie. Where are my SurgeStix?

Can I get one for my cat?

[giafly]

Picture [kotaku.com]

Re:

[tepples]

Yeah, but the only game it plays is Human Crossing.

Helmut comes with free game . . .

[cashman73]

Comes with the blockbuster hit, OMG PONIES!!!!!!!!!!!1

A WiiHelm? What a scream...

[mccalli]

C'mon people, no-one picked up on the reference [wikipedia.org] yet...?

Cheers,
Ian

That's not the reference

[tepples]

The reference is Nintendo On [wikipedia.org].

Re:

[antdude]

YouTube [youtube.com] has a video compilation from various movies. From AQFL [aqfl.net].

Hang on!

[jrothwell97]

There still hasn't been a pi reference in the Slashrating box yet!

Hold on... I just need to go and feed my pig, and perhaps trim the feathers on his wings.

Even better idea

[saibot834]

I've got a brilliant idea! Why not just use a mouse and a keyboard! That way you could move even less...oh wait...

The only video you need for this story:

[Spazntwich]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=cdbYsoEasio [youtube.com]

Disappointed

[Kelson]

I read the headline and thought that Wilhelms were going on sale -- and I wanted my own copy of the famous sound effect [wikipedia.org]!

application

[jovius]

i wonder when they come up with a game you would actually play while sleeping.. the helmet would be perfect. or attached controllers to your limbs, if you are active.. eye movement tracker. a massively multiplayer haphazard game, which would probably be awesomely funny to watch.

30,000 Microsofties go to work for Nintendo

[DECS]

Microsoft Performs Illegal Operation, Shuts Down [roughlydrafted.com]

Microsoft Corp. issued a surprise press release this morning announcing that the company had "performed an illegal operation and would be shut down." Company executives refused to provide further information regarding the cause of the unexpected shutdown, only issuing a cryptic error number of $00038FF577 and advising all interested parties to "contact their system administrator."

Re:

[David Rolfe]

From the article linked above:

Rob Enderle, principle analyst of the Rob Enderle Total Analysis Research Division, was unavailable for comment. Also unavailable were TechNewsWorld and MacNewsWorld, two web news sites that frequently cite the RETARD's analysis on Microsoft. Enderle formerly wrote columns on the sites, which now return 404 errors in Spanish.

Emphasis added. This is pure comedy gold. Thanks for making the Innertubularnets worth reading today. Also:

8-bit tie is YES!

What a shame...

[JohnnyBigodes]

I can see many sad, sad couch potatoes when realizing that this is an April's Fool and not an item that does allow you to play the Wii without moving your arms :)

now we just need a WWI game...

[Anonymous Coward]

...so that I can play as Kaiser WiiHelm II.

*ducks*

Availability

[slayermet420]

Did no one see this: Availability: Likely Everything from the email [thinkgeek.com] has availabilities like this.

OH MY GOD

[ilovegeorgebush]

OH MY GOD, it's past 1200 ALREADY!!!

My turn?

[x_codingmonkey_x]

OK I'm next in line, can I get modded insightful for no reason?

Awesome

[Jeppe Salvesen]

I've been meaning to build myself a nice, solid Henry Rollins-style neck for years. Now I can. Thank you, kind thinkgeek!

but..

[zmollusc]

I have ankylosing spondylitis, you insensitive clod!

Isn't the April Fools tag a bit counterproductive?

[Tozoku]

The fact that all of the joke news stories are tagged "aprilfools" makes it a fair bit easier to avoid falling for any of them.

I wish some of their 4/1 products were real

[oracleofbargth]

Aww, man. I really wanted one of the 8-bit ties too.

Re:

[Roane]

You're not alone. So not alone, they're actually working on making the ties. http://www.thinkgeek.com/apparel/hats-ties/9352/?c pg=50T [thinkgeek.com]

Crippled people

[rgo]

If this helmet really existed, it could get people without limbs into gaming.
This shit seems like a good product, if you target it to the right market.

Head movements are dangerous

[unity100]

Brain is not a muscle. Nor it is tightly fixed to the skull.

It floats in a fluid in the skull, the attachment it has to the skull are through tiny veins.

if you use your head to move something in a continuous way, you will be shaking your brain in the skull fluid like in a glass of water. in the long run it will make nausea. in the worst run, tiny veins will pop, causing headache, or in extreme cases more serious results.

whereas making instant movements with the head is much more dangerous, it instantly pops your tiny veins.

use your arms. you need the exercise.

FOOLS this IS the trailer for Tron II

[FuzyBaffy]

Look at her room it is all white. She has a helmet with glowing buttons. She was obviously playing some Wii and the CPU sucked her into the system and she has to compete in Wii sports to save her program and get out. The bad program is obviously a PS3 program. She Wiill outsmart the PS3 program with her sassyness and escape.

You guys totally missed the joke

[Phybersyk0]

See, she's wearing a helmet. Retards sometimes wear helmets.

Retard Helmet + Wii Controller + You = WIITARDED.