Obama Sends Nuclear Experts To Tackle BP Oil Spill

An anonymous reader writes "The US has sent a team of nuclear physicists to help BP plug the 'catastrophic' flow of oil into the Gulf of Mexico from its leaking Deepwater Horizon well, as the Obama administration becomes frustrated with the oil giant's inability to control the situation. The five-man team — which includes a man who helped develop the first hydrogen bomb in the 1950s — is the brainchild of Steven Chu, President Obama's Energy Secretary." Let's hope this doesn't mean they actually try the nuclear option. In other offshore drilling news, reader mygoditsfullofdoom informs us that a Venezuelan gas rig has sunk in the Caribbean (with no loss of life). This one is being laid at the feet of Venezuela's state oil company PDVSA, which hasn't exactly been regarded as uber-competent "after President Hugo Chavez fired half the company's managers and senior engineers following a 2002 strike."

The Nuclear Experts will use the LHC...

[jayveekay]

They are planning to use the LHC to create a small black hole and drop it into the gusher to suck up all the oil.

I think that would silence the critics of both the LHC, the oil drilling industry, and Apple's restrictive rules about apps!

Re:The Nuclear Experts will use the LHC...

[K. S. Kyosuke]

LHC? Leaking Hydrocarbon Caulker?

Re:Nuclear physicists?

[K. S. Kyosuke]

The people in charge were obviously told that in order to fix a problem of such scale, experts with new clear perspective were needed.

Blowing shit up

[retech]

Blowing something up is always the best option. Detonating a large fuel reserve to stop it from leaking makes perfect sense to me. Absolutely nothing to worry about.

Re:The Nuclear Experts will use the LHC...

[Anonymous Coward]

BP isn't American either. Sorry to burst your pendantasy?

Re:Why would the nuclear option be bad?

[RockoTDF]

I think we should do it just so that some accountant at BP has to enter "Cost of nuclear warhead" into their excel spreadsheet. At least that way we can get a laugh out of this.

Wrong team!

[Ruvim]

Where is Bruce Willis and his team? I am sure they'd do it at the last second!

Re:The Nuclear Experts will use the LHC...

[spongman]

Hmmm... A vertical shaft containing oil. Isn't that already a blackhole?

Re:Ok...

[Anonymous Coward]

There is nothing wrong with using physicists. They will work hard to stop the oil leak. After all, it lets them show the world that physics can trump chemistry (which is the dream of every physicist)!

Re:BP's fucked.. but look, over there, a communist

[FuckingNickName]

What are you doing on Slashdot when you should be in Venezuela mandatorily fighting Chavez?

Re:The Nuclear Experts will use the LHC...

[eclectro]

create a small black hole and drop it into the gusher to suck up all the oil.

First contact with aliens: "Hey idiots, here's your oil back!!"

Re:Obama is a genius!!!

[thoughtfulbloke]

Well, if we use oil drillers to use nukes to stop an asteroid catastrophe, it only makes sense to bring in the nuclear scientists to deal with an out of control oil well.

Re:Hay for Cleanup?

[SharpFang]

Mow Your Lawn For Saving The Sea action?
Every white picket fence house donating some hay? ...in no time.

Re:why not nuclear?

[ffreeloader]

Actually, I think stuffing entire Utah town down that hole would stop the leak, and it wouldn't require any oxygen. We could remove all humans first.

Re:Terribly inaccurate - team is multidisciplinary

[Thing 1]

George Cooper, Alexander Slocum and Jonathan I Katz, though? Not nuke guys.

Wait, what? No, really? He's back?

Re:Blowing shit up

[The Snowman]

One of the most widely used methods of putting out oil well fires is to detonate dynamite in the well fire. The explosion has the effect of both consuming oxygen as well as blowing oxygen away from the fire.

Not only is this well not on fire, it is underwater. Last time I checked, water not only doesn't burn, it actually puts out fires.