RoboBonobo: A Project To Outfit Apes With Tablets and Telepresence Bots 68
MrSeb writes "Ken Schweller, a computer scientist and psychologist, and also the chairman of the Great Ape Trust in Des Moines, Iowa, has a vision: He wants to put wireless Android tablets in the hands of bonobo apes. The Great Ape Trust Sanctuary is home to seven bonobos, including the world-famous Kanzi, and two orangutans. So far the Sanctuary has focused almost exclusively on language, with the bonobos and their keepers communicating through lexigrams on a touch-screen TV. Now Schweller wants to go one step further and outfit the bonobos with wireless tablets running custom Bonobo Chat software, allowing the apes to communicate with their keepers (and other bonobos!) from anywhere in the Sanctuary, and to remotely control devices such as vending machines, doors, and the RoboBonobo. If all this wasn't weird (cool?) enough, the RoboBonobo is even outfitted with a water cannon (so the telepresent apes can play "chase games" with humans) and Schweller is trying to fund the whole thing with Kickstarter. If you're a big fan of apes (or Darwinism), be sure to donate."
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And Moses Said... (Score:1)
Get your filthy paws off my Android you stinking ape!
Monkeys are bad, m'kay?
Planet of the Apes coming soon (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Planet of the Apes coming soon (Score:5, Funny)
More likely is that they'll learn to write and understand english and we'll see yet another wave of tech support outsourcing.
Re:Planet of the Apes coming soon (Score:4, Funny)
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Re:Planet of the Apes coming soon (Score:5, Funny)
*sunglasses*
yeeaaahhh!
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Much more likely they will hack it to get the internet and spend the rest of the day looking at porn sites. Well, they are bonobos.
iPad (Score:2, Funny)
Apple already tried this in USA. Even got the monosyllabic monkeys to pay for their own hardware.
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If they do use GNOME, will they be using Bonobo [wikipedia.org]?
Rise of the... (Score:4, Funny)
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Re:Rise of the... (Score:5, Informative)
Planet of the Bonobos.
A female dominated polygamous society that spends most of the day eating fresh fruit and screwing? Count me in!
However there's a flaw in your vision of paradise, bonobo's are the hippies of the ape world, they have a complex society that allows them to spend their days eating fresh fruit and fucking. They are not known to kill others of their species, territorial disputes, mating rights, etc, are settled via bonobo politics and diplomacy. So of the 3 species in your vision, I think they are the species most likely to be picking daisies.
Now if a regular chimp got hold of a predator they wouldn't hesitate to shoot you in the face and rip your genitals off.
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So of the 3 species in your vision, I think they are the species most likely to be picking daisies.
It's a false front to get us to trust them with our killer robots. Don't be fooled! They're complete bastards when humans aren't watching.
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Planet of the Bonobos. If they have wireless tabs, then one clever one will find a way to take control of a Predator. What then humans? It's going to be World War 3, between Bonobos and Robot Overlords with us stuck in the middle trying to stick flowers into their barrels. Wang Weilin will be squished.
I'm more worried about all the spam they'll start sending.
For their Penis Fencing Festivals and that kind of stuff.
MojoJojo! (Score:1)
Isn't this how it started?
Advances in science! (Score:5, Funny)
Knowing Bonobos, this project will also have to involve some kind of teledildonics, right?
I'm all for this project.. you know.. for science!
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Hahaha "3 bonobo 1 chimp"... nice..
Uhm... (Score:2)
If you're a big fan of apes (or Darwinism), be sure to donate.
How do the apes feel about this?
I see the birth of a new Super Hero... (Score:2)
The Robo-Bonobo-Hobo!!!! with his Android sidekick and his ability to tell killer jokes with sign language!!!
That's not creepy... not at all... (Score:2)
When I saw that "telepresence" thing, I got flashbacks to that part in "Faces of Death" where they ate the monkey brains... do no want.
It's already this way all over the world (Score:3)
with Apple iPads. Android is just a runner up.
Tablets to apes.
All *bleep* Caesar (Score:2)
So now as the real life version of Planet of the Apes unfolds, Caesar will not only be smart and pissed, he'll look like Jimmy Durante and be hornier than Warren Beatty?
And so the Uplift begins. (Score:5, Funny)
David Brin must be openly grinning over this.
Block (Score:2)
Bonobos? I hope they didn't forget to set the pr0n filter, or available bandwidth will never be enough....
And keep them from posting on youtube!!!!
Lemmings (Score:2)
...I suppose this is following Apple's similar success with the iPad and lemmings?
-Chris
Weird (Score:5, Funny)
If you replace 'the bonobos' with 'management' and make other, similar simple changes to the summary, you'd get a fairly accurate description of the office where I work.
It's uncanny, I tell you. I wonder if those security cameras are something other than what they seem?
Another evil plot! (Score:2)
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Where's the Apestore? (Score:1)
I'm sure the apes are not DAUs, this category is still occupied by humans...
Great, just what we need... (Score:2)
Digital monkeys flinging digital poo at us.
Oh well. It would still be better than Trade Chat in World of Warcraft.
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So basically... (Score:2)
They use the idea of giving monkeys smartphones to drum up funding for their research, and then when the smartphones don't actually help anything they take them from the monkeys to use themselves.
Porn (Score:1)
Siri (Score:2)
~ (bing bing) Get.your.stinking.paws.off.me.you.damned.dirty.ape. OK?
.
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~ (bong bong) Ook Eeek Ook AH AH!
-ting-tang-walla-walla-bing-bang-
Oops, dmca from EMI/Sony descends...
Bad news for Microsoft (Score:2)
Once a new species gets started using Android, it's really hard to switch them over to Windows. This doesn't bode well for MS's survival over the next million years or so.
I'm a great ape... (Score:2)
I'm technically a great ape. Can I have a tablet and telepresence bot, please?
Elected 'Darwinism' (Score:1)