PDA Speech Translator 161
jlowery writes "Not quite as good as a babelfish, but a PDA that does translation is probably better than resorting to hand gestures alone. I could see this as a boon to the tourist who travels to places where English speakers are uncommon."
Had to be said (Score:5, Funny)
And here (Score:3, Funny)
Good Idea... (Score:5, Funny)
Yeah, I could really use one of these when I go from Fort Lauderdale to Miami...
Yeah, thanks, but I'll wait for a bit... (Score:3, Funny)
Forgive my immediate misgivings, and you can call me chicken if you want, but I'm really not that keen on walking into a hospital and asking to have a medical procedure done with a 1 in 5 chance that instead of removing my appendix, they might remove my "appendage"...
Excellent! (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Good Grief... (Score:2, Funny)
What do you call someone who speaks three languages? A polyglot.
What do you call someone who speaks two languages? A bilingual.
What do you call someone who speaks one language? An American.
I've always wanted to sound like... (Score:2, Funny)
I can see it now... (Score:5, Funny)
"I speak to the English, it's the Americans I won't talk to..."
-Adam
Yelling Helps (Score:4, Funny)
*hold PDA to face* Ahem! "WHERE IS THE BATHROOM?!" *hold PDA to foreigner's ear*
"My hovercraft is full of eels" (Score:5, Funny)
Text on screen: In 2004, the World Trade Center lay in ruins, and foreign nationalists frequented the streets - many of them Arabs (not the streets - the foreign nationals). Anyway, many of these Arabs went into tobacconist's shops to buy cigarettes....
A Arab tourist approaches the shopclerk. The tourist is talking haltingly into a PDA.
Arab: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Sorry?
Arab: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.
Clerk: Uh, no, no, no. This is a tobacconist's.
Arab: Ah! I will not buy this *tobacconist's*, it is scratched.
Clerk: No, no, no, no. Tobacco...um...cigarettes (holds up a pack).
Arab: Ya! See-gar-ets! Ya! Uh...My hovercraft is full of eels.
Clerk: Sorry?
Arab: My hovercraft (pantomimes puffing a cigarette)...is full of eels (pretends to strike a match).
Clerk: Ahh, matches!
Arab: Ya! Ya! Ya! Ya! Do you waaaaant...do you waaaaaant...to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?
Clerk: Here, I don't think you're using that thing right.
Arab: You great poof.
Clerk: That'll be six and six, please.
Arab: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? I...I am no longer infected.
Clerk: Uh, may I, uh...(takes PDA, talks to it)...Costs six and six...ah, here we are. (speaks weird Arabic-sounding words)
Arab punches the clerk.
Meanwhile, a cop on a quiet street cups his ear as if hearing a cry of distress. He sprints for many blocks and finally enters the tobacconist's.
Cop: What's up
Arab: Ah. You have beautiful thighs.
Cop: (looks down at himself) WHAT?!?
Clerk: He hit me!
Arab: Drop your panties, Sir William; I cannot wait 'til lunchtime. (points at clerk)
Cop: RIGHT!!! (drags Arab away by the arm)
Arab: (indignantly) My nipples explode with delight!
Re:Hmmm (Score:2, Funny)
Bah! (Score:3, Funny)
...where English speakers are uncommon (Score:2, Funny)
Will it work on politicians? (Score:2, Funny)