Company Invents Electronic Underpants

theodp writes "SIMsystem have created the world's first electric underpants that let you know that you've got issues by texting. Incontinence issues, to be more precise. The new-and-improved skivvies come equipped with a sensor strip that alerts caregivers to wetness via text message. From the technology summary: 'The SIMbox, when fitted into the individual resident's stretchpants (SIMpants), transmits sensor readings from the SIMstrip in the SIMpad® over a wireless network to the SIMserver. The SIMsystemManager software running on the SIMserver then detects key information about continence events and determines when to alert care staff about an event requiring attention.' So, who's going to start an open source project?"

"open source project?"

[Vinegar Joe]

Peenix.

The mystery has been solved!

[roblarky]

Phase 1: Steal Underpants Phase 2: Retrofit with electronic apparatus Phase 3: PROFIT!

Finally,

[Dogbertius]

A way to efficiently handle buffer overflows in real time.

The scientific frontier

[Gizzmonic]

1960's: Walking on the moon

2000's: Walking on the moon in underwear that will tweet whenever the astronaut voids his bladder!

We've made so much progress!

A boon for socialite incontenents

[asdf7890]

[accident happens at party]
* Damn, I need an excuse to go deal with this before anyone notices
* Pants send SMS to user
* Looks at phone. "Sorry guys, I've got to deal with this." - heads away looking like an important person whi is on-call rather than an incontinent person who has just paid an unintended call.

Re:What will hold them up?

[asylumx]

I'm guessing that too much fiber would cause a different issue....

If this is powered by a lithium battery:

[Adaeniel]

It could bring new meaning to the phrase "liar, liar, pants on fire."

Re:Not a joke

[c++0xFF]

A bit like morse code only with a lower bandwidth.

More like a new IP protocol.

Sorry ... couldn't resist.

Re:"open source project?"

[ebombme]

http://www.reynholm.co.uk/images/douglas.jpg [reynholm.co.uk] "God Damn... these electric sex pants!!!" Douglas Reynholm would like to have a word with you...

Re:Underpants GNOME?

[svtdragon]

There's no need. REAL men's underwear don't ever get GUI!

/ducks

tech support

[antibryce]

if your electronic underwear won't sync with the server check your IP settings. Then make sure the portscanner is working. In the event of a total failure feel free to use the finger utility. Just be sure to zip up after you're done.

Sample Message

[bodland]

lmao u jez pizd ur pants