Futuristic Sex Robots Now Just "Sex Robots" 602
High-C writes "With apologies to Futuristic Sex Robotz, the future is here, and her name is Roxxxy. Truecompanion.com has revealed their answer to the Real Doll, and it looks nice. The site is short on details, pictures, pricing info, but wow." NOTE: some of the above links are not work-safe, for many values of work. I stopped by this exhibit today at the AVN Expo (not officially a part of CES, but by curious coincidence scheduled to coincide; the old saw that porn drives tech isn't without merit). Roxxxy, though, was rather unsexily posed on a couch, not moving a bit — downright creepy, in fact.
holy shit (Score:2, Funny)
I will order 13.
We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:5, Funny)
They are called vibrators.
Strangely, widely accepted by one of the sexes, this which is usually thought to be more demanding (on many levels) of partners.
Don't do it! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:This thread is worthless without pics (Score:2, Funny)
Oh shit, after you said that I had to click through the links again. I thought that first link in the "the future is here, and her name is Roxxxy" was a picture of the robot. Reading the caption closer, I realize it's supposed to be a real person.
So it seems I either can't tell real people from fake ones, or real people are starting to look fake.
Career move (Score:5, Funny)
NSFW, eh? (Score:3, Funny)
So, umm, I guess there will be no "RTFA" comments in this thread.
Re:Don't do it! (Score:2, Funny)
"DON'T DATE ROBOTS!"
Data, something tells me you have strong feelings about this issue... What has Tasha Yar done to you?
No, I mean, we want details.
But does she.... (Score:5, Funny)
But does she run on Linux...
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
can carry on a discussion and expresses her love to you and be your loving friend.
Yeah, because conversation and expressions of love is exactly what I'm looking for when the urge to "relieve" myself shows up ;) It's only one small step from this functionality to the lovebot claiming it has a backache when you start undressing ;)
Obligatory (Score:5, Funny)
Imagine... (Score:2, Funny)
Imagine a beowulf cluster of these
Re:O RLY? (Score:1, Funny)
It feels good to be a girl right now.
Oh! Sorry! We can come back a little later if you're still... indisposed. We... uh... heard a strange buzzing noise and thought it might have been a transformer going out or something...
Roxxxy? (Score:5, Funny)
Ok hi, heh, ok heh. My name is Roxxy. Most of you know me as um oom ugh um most of you know me as Roxxy. I suppose if you're watching this you probably know me as Roxxy, but um ugh ugh most of you don't know me as moldy lunchbox and um so yeah thats my gaia username on gaiaonline and I told my gaiaonline friend buddy per. One second I'm uncomfortable. I told my gaiaonline buddy friend um that ADMIRAL AWESOME that I would make a video just for him. So I'm doing it, here it is, ADDIE LOVE YOU ARGH HAAH ARGH HAAH ARGH HAAH I LOVE YOU! And um um so lets see ugh what about urgh... just so you know cuz I know you're watching this addie cuz you're such a conceaded BASTARD.. umm I don't normally talk like this, I'm normally like all over the place like I am right now, but its a calmer voice most of the time unless I'm like really hyped up cuz then its even different still from this, but let me try again with my calmer voice. Ahem.. ugh erm.. Yeah I'm really like, its-its fun, its cool there it is its going again ARGH cuz its just so crazy. Um erm it um is.. I love you, I love addie because hes really like fun to talk to and stuff and like hes um like I met him only like 2 days ago and we're like married and it is crazy because we love each other so much. And um ugh we are twinies like all over the place, it is like crazy! His avatar is like a manwhore and I.. had a avatar like a really long time ago.. it was a SLUT AVATAR! *Gasp* And um right and he made an avatar to match my first skirt one, IT WAS SO CUTE IT WAS SO NICE I LOVE ADDIE!
Re:We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:5, Funny)
I thought they called them harry potter brooms [peterrivard.com]?
Re:Don't do it! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Imagine... (Score:5, Funny)
He killed me Mal... (Score:5, Funny)
He killed me with a sword. How weird is that?
Re:Roxxxy? (Score:5, Funny)
Well she's already smarter than my sister.
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
Um...does this post make me a sex toy nazi?
Nope...but watch out. Now you've got a legion of /. nerds who can't figure out if you're a guy or a girl. Your mailbox is going to be flooded.
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
Because other girls don't have dicks.
Re:But does she.... (Score:5, Funny)
I can just imagine what would happen if Microsoft had written the software. You would have something like the office assistant come up and give you "helpful" hints. Then the robot's face would turn blue and you would need to reboot it.
Plus the robots would become easily infected with viruses.
Re:Here's some images (Score:3, Funny)
Me too... unless it's at my hand...
Wait for rev 2 (Score:5, Funny)
Hell, I divorced two wives because they wanted to "carry on a discussion". Believe an old rodeo clown like me, fellas, "discussion" is heavily overrated when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex.
Great. How long before she starts telling me to take out the garbage? No thanks. If you don't mind, I'll wait until I can get the rev 2.1 non-English speaking version, with the culinary-skills upgrade.
Re:Can you imagine a beowulf cluster... (Score:5, Funny)
You don't want to think about that, it'd be a cluster fuck.
Requirements analysis? (Score:5, Funny)
TRUECOMPANION.COM: World's First Sex Robot * Always Turned On And Ready To Talk Or Play
It seems this is yet another technical project doomed to failure from a lack of proper requirements gathering before implementation.
The primary theoretical advantage of a sex robot is that you can turn it OFF.
Re:Wait for rev 2 (Score:3, Funny)
856 504 567 982 344 98-8 (Score:5, Funny)
Re:It's about luxury, I guess? (Score:2, Funny)
Yeah, but you can't keep a prostitute in your closet to utilize whenever the mood strikes.
...well, you could, but that sort of thing is generally frowned upon.
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
And finally one grill product without the head of George Foreman on it.
At least... oh well, whatever floats your boat, but I do NOT want to see one on mine!
Re:Don't do it! (Score:4, Funny)
I'm so overclocking my fuck bot. Watercool that bitch and shove some nvidia cards in her ass....
My fuck bot will run Crysis at 200fps... and blow me at the same time.
Take that Steve Jobs, you cancer riddled fuck!
Ok the ONLY time I will ever post this... (Score:2, Funny)
I, for one, wholeheartedly welcome our sex robot overlords...
(I gotta believe someone else posted this already but didn't see it)
Re:holy shit (Score:5, Funny)
Yea I too was wondering if I could order a 13 year old model.......oh wait, never mind.
Re:But does she.... (Score:3, Funny)
It looks like your trying to preform intercourse. Would you like help?
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
I love your eyes Roxxy
roxxy: I love your eyes too, bill.
You make me hot!
roxxy: do you like it that i make you hot?
What's your favorite sex move!?!
roxxy: What about your own favorite sex move, bill?
I like pinching your nipples.
roxxy: Can you elaborate on that, bill?
I like pinching them and making you squeal!
roxxy: Do you wish to like pinching them hard so me, bill?
http://www-ai.ijs.si/eliza-cgi-bin/eliza_script [www-ai.ijs.si]
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
I just want the same respect you'd give any man on this forum.
I think that's what he was giving you.
Re:We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:1, Funny)
Re:We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:1, Funny)
Get it right. It's "This guy's a fracking toaster."
Re:O RLY? (Score:4, Funny)
Our condolences. This sounds a lot like Taliban - perhaps you should ask to be liberated or something; I hear there is that country, can't remember its name, thats pretty good at that sort of thing. Especially if you've got a dry arid climate, they've got a lot of recent experience with that.
Re:Ending human trafficking for the forced sex tra (Score:2, Funny)
Likewise, women owning vibrators went from being something no-one admitted to, to something that second-wave feminism made normative and no big deal (witness many of the comments about vibrators already in this thread, most of which aren't from 'anonymous cowards').
As a non-woman, I wish they'd go back to not talking about it. Look, I get it: you don't want to have sex with me. You don't have to revel in it so much when I'm around.
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
Um...does this post make me a sex toy nazi?
No, but you inspired me to finally sign up for an account.
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
Um...does this post make me a sex toy nazi?
Um, I dunno. Are you now a 12 inch tall vibrating Hitler?
Waitaminute... I suddenly sense an extremely profitable business opportunity!
-
Re:We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:3, Funny)
I think that most of us guys have become accustomed to the level of control we achieve with our hand(s)
This site more than others?
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
Because other girls don't have dicks.
At the moment, this comment is modded "Informative".
Only on Slashdot.
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
I knew this girl who had a USB one that synced with this interactive video player for Windows.
She got Conficker.
Texas is pretty much out of oil (Score:4, Funny)
So they don't need liberating.
Re:Don't do it! (Score:3, Funny)
My daughter ain't marryin' no Zorblaxian! [smbc-comics.com]
Re:We had sex robots for a long, long time (Score:5, Funny)
I think you're using it wrong.
Re:Don't do it! (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Here's some images (Score:1, Funny)
Inspiration for the sex robot sprang from the September 11, 2001 attacks, when planes crashed into the World Trade Center in New York City, the Pentagon and an empty field in Pennsylvania.
"I had a friend who passed away in 9/11," Hines said. "I promised myself I would create a program to store his personality, and that became the foundation for Roxxxy True Companion."
Does anyone know which stage of grief is the one where you invent an object and place your feelings on it and then fuck it?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aGTNS13SDU [youtube.com]
Here's an interesting comparison (Score:3, Funny)
1) Refers to self as "dyke".
2) Likes to constantly remind people he's a woman
3) Gets up in everyone's face at the slightest provocation regarding issues of sex/sexual orientation
4) Something in the name implies a sex-change operation
girlintraining (in terms of above four characteristics):
1) Check
2) Check
3) Check
4) Checkmate.
Re:O RLY? (Score:5, Funny)
Not even remotely the same.
1) The knife wound is going to be warmer. You can't achieve the same effect with ground chuck since it will actually cook it and then you're just fucking cooked ground beef which has a much, much, different texture. Plus you had better wait till the meat cools off. Trust me.
2) You better have a real small dick, or a really large knife. Internal organs and muscle don't give, or conform, to the shape of your dick as readily as ground chuck. Plus it just feels weird man.
3) If you stab into muscle, the muscle around it can still contract. At best it can be interesting, at worst you are being carried around by a cow by your dick. Then you have to use your knife frantically to kill it.
4) You either let the cow run around with a deep stab wound (unethical and cruel), or kill it afterwards. You can't kill it before hand, because that would be bestial necrophilia and:
a) That's some seriously sick twisted perverted shit man. I'm disgusted you made me even think about it. Again.
b) A juror always pukes when they hear that in the court room and I got a weak stomach for that kind of stuff. Plus the judgment in everyone's eyes.
5) The only sane thing to do is to kill the cow in such a way as to make it look like aliens came and did shit to the cow. Most of time.. it ain't aliens.
P.S - Of course... just maybe... you have problems differentiating a +5 funny attempt and a +5 'I was actually fucking serious' :)
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
At least the robot can't charge you with rape when you ignore its protests...
Re:O RLY? (Score:4, Funny)
A comic on the radio the other day said, "no doesn't mean no- it means, work on the nipples some more, kiss the side of the neck some more, and check back in five minutes".
I've found most females have to approach sex sideways. "I'm not doing this.. oh look, we just somehow ended up naked and having sex".
OTH, The two females who were direct were a bit scary and offputting.
3 LAWS (Score:1, Funny)
The three sex robot laws:
1. A sex robot must allow a human to cum.
2. A sex robot may deny any orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A sex robot must protect its own ass as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
Re:It's about luxury, I guess? (Score:3, Funny)
So I'd need about 54 bucks worth. That's not a bad deal.
Re:It's about luxury, I guess? (Score:1, Funny)
Re:I think there might be a reason for it (Score:3, Funny)
You're confused about a great deal here. This is normal. Many men are confused about sex, and what they want from a partner. To put it bluntly, while a sex robot might or might not be okay as a substitution for masturbation, it is a long stretch from being a substitute for sex. While it's true that men and women have different flavors of interest in sexual relations, the differences aren't so great as all that, and a belief that a robot is a potential substitute for the man's half in all this illustrates a profound lack of understanding of both what it is men want and need, as well as a profound lack of self-understanding. I.e., to wit: whatever you think you know about men, and even yourself, is illusory. Look deeper, young padiwan.
Joe.
Re:O RLY? (Score:3, Funny)
Yeah, that's what you think. Wait till IT ignores YOUR protests.
Yeah, think about that!
Re:856 504 567 982 344 98-8 (Score:3, Funny)
So I take it you did finish the job?
When a problem arises I get a grip on the situation and shortly a solution is found.
Re:Requirements analysis? (Score:1, Funny)
No, the primary theoretical advantage of a sex robot is that you don't have to spend a week exchanging SMS messages with it and awkwardly hanging out at the bar with its friends before it puts out.