AT&T To Replace 17,000 Batteries

An anonymous reader writes "After four fires in two years — see earlier Slashdot discussions for background — AT&T is going against its own independent lab findings and declaring that the Avestor batteries powering its U-verse network aren't safe and need to be replaced. This is the network that SBC was building out prior to acquiring AT&T. Following the latest broadband equipment cabinet explosion in Wisconsin, the carrier says it will swap out 17,000 batteries deployed in several states across its network."

The Catch:

[Icarus1919]

AT&T will be replacing them with batteries that explode MORE often. The current frequency of explosion is unacceptable

Metric

[Stanistani]

"Sir, we've experienced an explosive growth in customer satisfaction!"

Houston incidents

[I8TheWorm]

Said one AT&T employee in Houston...

"I don't know nuthin' about fautly batteries. But Houston is dang hot, and it ain't no dry heat. Things just catch on fire all the time. It's hotter than a whore in Sunday church down here."

Re:not a mention of the recycling details

[calebt3]

what they do with all these batteries?

Sell them to Sony.

They're getting 17,000 new batteries?

[Chris Mattern]

No wonder my drugstore is out of AAs!

Chris Mattern

Re:There's nothing good hearted about this

[Anonymous Coward]

Narrator: A new car built by my company leaves somewhere traveling at 60 mph. The rear differential locks up. The car crashes and burns with everyone trapped inside. Now, should we initiate a recall? Take the number of vehicles in the field, A, multiply by the probable rate of failure, B, multiply by the average out-of-court settlement, C. A times B times C equals X. If X is less than the cost of a recall, we don't do one.
Business woman on plane: Are there a lot of these kinds of accidents?
Narrator: You wouldn't believe.
Business woman on plane: Which car company do you work for?
Narrator: A major one.

Achmed the Terrorist Energizer Bunny

[Anonymous Coward]

Come on, you all want to see the commercial where the voiceover says: "Energizer Bunny keeps going and going and go- KABOOM! For fuck's sake, can't we find a bunny who hasn't turned suicide bomber?! Didn't airport security check the interior of his drum?"

Even better would be Achmed the Dead Terrorist dressed up in an Energizer Bunny outfit. "Hi, I am Achmed. I keep going and going and... I KEEEEEIIILL YOU!!". If you haven't yet seen it, check out Jeff Dunham's Achmed the Dead Terrorist act [youtube.com]. IMO, it's absolutely hilarious.

Re:not a mention of the recycling details

[ScrewMaster]

I wonder if anybody is watching to see what they do with all these batteries?

Probably send them to Iraq. Just let the terrorists steal them to power their equipment.

This is exactly why it is a bad idea

[neapolitan]

to offer 'integrated' [slashdot.org] batteries into devices.

Imagine what a recall of the iPod or Macbook Air battery would do to Apple's share price.

(Now smile to yourself, quietly.)