Follow Slashdot blog updates by subscribing to our blog RSS feed

Microsoft Robots to Watch Kids 544

Posted by samzenpus on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:00AM from the if-I-sleep-the-robot-will-get-me dept.

Archangel Michael writes "Microsoft announced today that is testing a new toy / robot to watch over kids. My question is, if the toy BSOD does it take the kid with it? Now we are letting inanimate objects raise our kids! When will it end?"

This discussion has been archived. No new comments can be posted.

Microsoft Robots to Watch Kids

Search 544 Comments Log In/Create an Account

Comments Filter:

Sounds like Awesomo! (Score:5, Funny)

by iolaus ( 704845 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:02AM (#11832736) Homepage

Awesomo loves you!

Share
twitter facebook
Umm... (Score:5, Funny)

by Quaoar ( 614366 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:02AM (#11832740)

Unless this "robot" is a block of cheese, it's probably going to be fairly animate.

Share
twitter facebook
The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

by Richie1984 ( 841487 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:02AM (#11832742)

The teddy bear sitting in the corner of the child's room might look normal, until his head starts following the kid around using a face recognition program

Does anyone else think that this could be the scariest thing ever? Especially if they make a clown version?

Share
twitter facebook
Linux (Score:5, Funny)

by BladeMelbourne ( 518866 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:03AM (#11832754)

I give it two months before someone can boot Linux on it, and in 6 months they could do it without needing to solder...

Share
twitter facebook
Obligatory Bender reference (Score:3, Funny)

by n1ywb ( 555767 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:05AM (#11832772) Homepage Journal

KILL ALL HUMANS!!
Do you think Bill Gates will keep a universal robot remote control in her bra like Mom?

Share
twitter facebook
Clippy (Score:5, Funny)

by millwall ( 622730 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:06AM (#11832782)

Robot with Clippy's voice:

"Hi kid! It looks like you are peeing, do you want me to help?"

Share
twitter facebook
Kids nowadays... (Score:5, Funny)

by RayTardo ( 779153 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:08AM (#11832789)

Now we are letting inanimate objects raise our kids!

You've obviously never hired a teenage babysitter...

Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:5, Funny)

by millwall ( 622730 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:09AM (#11832801)

"My experience is that XP itself is incredibly stable.

Congratulations on getting a post that included this sentence to be modded "Informative" :-)

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:5, Funny)

by windowpain ( 211052 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:09AM (#11832804) Journal

1) A robot may not use a non-Microsoft product or through inaction, allow a human being to use a non-Microsoft product.

2) A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

3) A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

Share
twitter facebook
Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

by C0d1ngM0nk3y ( 851310 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:09AM (#11832806) Homepage

Hehe....

'Can't sleep, clown will eat me....!'

Parent Share
twitter facebook
In other news (Score:5, Funny)

by Nine Tenths of The W ( 829559 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:10AM (#11832811)

Michael Jackson announces a sudden decision to become a cyborg.

Share
twitter facebook
Um Thats TV's job (Score:5, Funny)

by bigattichouse ( 527527 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:11AM (#11832819) Homepage

That job would belong to television thank you very much. Why every one of my 9 kids here in the trailor park wuz done raised good on TV. How many slashdotters remember the jingle sung by a cowboy on CBS, "After the messegez, weee'll be rigghhht back"... Inanimate objects have been raising our kids for 50 years.. and it shows.

Share
twitter facebook
sarah Conner (Score:5, Funny)

by FidelCatsro ( 861135 ) writes: <fidelcatsro.gmail@com> on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:12AM (#11832824) Journal

Are You Sarah Conner
Well Im here to babysit your child.
you can Download driver updates at MSky.net
Thank you for updating The babysiters web browser Please reboot me
Ill be back

Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:4, Funny)

by Vollernurd ( 232458 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:13AM (#11832832)

Then you, sir, are using the wrong Screensaver [sysinternals.com].

Parent Share
twitter facebook
All right! (Score:3, Funny)

by Zorilla ( 791636 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:13AM (#11832841)

We've been waiting 20 years for the 2005 equivilant of Teddy Ruxpin, who scared the shit out of kids everywhere back in the 80s. The day has finally come!

Share
twitter facebook
Re:Linux (Score:5, Funny)

by Mikey-San ( 582838 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:15AM (#11832859) Homepage Journal

I give it two months before someone can boot Linux on it [. . .]

So not only will the child have dependencies on her teddy bear, but the teddy bear will have dependencies of its own?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:perspective please (Score:5, Funny)

by imag0 ( 605684 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:16AM (#11832870) Homepage

...At least this robot might create the opportunity to go play outside...

yeah. What you going to do? chain your kid to the robot and spring for the extra nice mag wheels to drag the little fecker into the "big blue room" on command?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:16AM (#11832871)

Why are there always the inevitable jokes about BSODs?
That's what inevitable means.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:In other news (Score:5, Funny)

by Zorilla ( 791636 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:16AM (#11832874)

I thought he already was one.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

by camcorder ( 759720 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:17AM (#11832881)

I've NEVER seen 2000 or XP produce a blue screen of death EVER...
Because Microsoft replaced the technology on win 2k and xp with Gray Screen of Shutdown.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Just wait... (Score:3, Funny)

by slavik1337 ( 705019 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:17AM (#11832882)

New source of child porn? >.>

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

by netman12 ( 863415 ) writes: <netman@kenork.com> on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:17AM (#11832885)

perhaps also allowing a parent talk to the child through a special phone, or monitor the child via a camera and wireless Internet connection.
And at 2am the child wakes up screaming, after someone hacked into the robot and played a recording of Chucky?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Clippy (Score:1, Funny)

by polle404 ( 727386 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:18AM (#11832886)

"Hi kid! It looks like you are peeing, do you want me to help?"
yeah, give it Michael Jackson's voice instead,
that'll really freak the parents out.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Just IMAGINE the EULA on this thing! (Score:3, Funny)

by windowpain ( 211052 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:21AM (#11832916) Journal

"Except for any refund elected by Microsoft, YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO ANY DAMAGES, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, if the Robot wrecks everything you own and KILLS YOUR FREAKIN' KID."

Share
twitter facebook
he is (Score:3, Funny)

by Prince Vegeta SSJ4 ( 718736 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:24AM (#11832937)

the second cousin twice removed on his father's side of Snagglepus [google.com]
Heavens to mergatroyd!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Just IMAGINE the EULA on this thing! (Score:4, Funny)

by Anita Coney ( 648748 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:24AM (#11832943) Homepage

No, I'd bet Microsoft would give five bucks!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:3, Funny)

by R.Caley ( 126968 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:27AM (#11832969)

has anyone ever seen XP or 2000 SP3 actually BSOD on a regular basis.
yes.
My experience is that XP itself is incredibly stable. Infinitely more so than 95 or 98.
A three legged stool with one leg missing and a bad woodworm infestation standing on the back of an enraged bull being sodomised with a cheese grater in an earthquake zone is more stable than 98 or 95.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
The solution for that is... (Score:2, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:28AM (#11832975)

Microsoft Parent 2086?

Just imagine the Slashdot posts by then:

"Thats what happens when you deregulate the robotics market. The fact they license by number of children is unfair!! What if one of my kids is a clone!?!? I want my kids to be raised by an open source father."

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:5, Funny)

by AndroidCat ( 229562 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:30AM (#11832999) Homepage

4. Classified.
(Remember that Robocop boots in DOS.)

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:All right! (Score:2, Funny)

by white1827 ( 848173 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:31AM (#11833003) Homepage

A friend of mine got a Teddy Ruxpin for his birthday. He didn't like it. Of course it was his 16th birthday... Yay clueless aunt.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:agh (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:36AM (#11833033)

You just don't get blue humor.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Super Toys Last All Summer Long... (Score:3, Funny)

by adzoox ( 615327 ) * writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:43AM (#11833079) Journal

Ha ... and I wonder how many of them have "only told their teddy bears" where the bodies are?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Robots (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:52AM (#11833140)

Everybody knows all robots from Momcorp run on alcohol.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:agh (Score:2, Funny)

by CoderBob ( 858156 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:53AM (#11833150)

Can I beat it with a stick?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
They are here to protect us... (Score:4, Funny)

by displague ( 4438 ) writes: <slashdot AT displague DOT com> on Thursday March 03, 2005 @09:58AM (#11833179) Homepage Journal

Do you have stairs in your house?

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:They are here to protect us... (Score:2, Funny)

by Loren_Burlingame ( 787768 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:06AM (#11833245) Homepage

I am protected

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:agh (Score:1, Funny)

by Tekzel ( 593039 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:14AM (#11833305)

Since when is the BSOD a dead horse? Its a evil satanic horse, but a living one, with glowing red eyes, just waiting to eat your data.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

by Ed Avis ( 5917 ) writes: <ed@membled.com> on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:16AM (#11833322) Homepage

In Soviet Russia, children play with toys!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:The horror! (Score:3, Funny)

by mzwaterski ( 802371 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:22AM (#11833356)

Can't sleep, clown will eat me...
Can't sleep, clown will eat me...

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:2, Funny)

by Gridpoet ( 634171 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:26AM (#11833412)

I thought is was:

1) A robot may not use a non-Microsoft product or through inaction, allow a human being to use a non-Microsoft product.

2) ????

3) PROFIT!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Mandatory ... (Score:4, Funny)

by cablepokerface ( 718716 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:38AM (#11833554)

It doesn't work man! I did the registry entries, rebooted and I am pressing ctrl. Then I tap ScrLk once, then t[NO CARRIER]

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Obligatory quote... (Score:5, Funny)

by Seoulstriker ( 748895 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:47AM (#11833656)

All your child are belong to us.

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:perspective please (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @10:49AM (#11833682)

But your parent is an anonymous coward!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
I hope they didn't re-use the Clippy code (Score:5, Funny)

by spun ( 1352 ) writes: <loverevolutionar ... .com minus berry> on Thursday March 03, 2005 @11:18AM (#11834033) Journal

"It looks like you are trying to go to the bathroom. Would you like help with that?"

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

by CherniyVolk ( 513591 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @11:22AM (#11834094)

1. Start regedit. (If you are unfamiliar with regedit, please refer to this FAQ)
2. Navigate to:
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\CurrentControlSet\S ervic es\i8042prt\Parameters
3. Create a new DWORD value and name it CrashOnCtrlScroll

I have an idea!

3. Create a new DWORD value and name it CrashOnRMouseClick

That should make the end users run for the hills. Geeks would never know!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
HEADLINE (Score:3, Funny)

by DrDebug ( 10230 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @01:16PM (#11835381) Journal

MICROSOFT ROBOT ATTACKS FIREFOX USER

(ap) A brief but violent incident between a new Microsoft 'nanny' robot and an Internet user was reported today.

"I had just activated the nanny robot and placed it next to my keyboard when I tried to access the Internet for further instructons" said the victim. "Suddenly the robot attacked me, biting my hands and trying to chew off my fingers. I just barely escaped. I had to beat the robot to death with my baseball bat. The only thing I can imagine why it attacked was because I was using the Firefox browser, and not Internet Explorer."

The visibly-shaken victim's injuries were treated at a local hospital, and he was released. Microsoft had no comment, other than to say there will be a patch issued soon.

--30--

Share
twitter facebook
Log error message (Score:3, Funny)

by SharpFang ( 651121 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @01:18PM (#11835402) Homepage Journal

The child has performed an illegal operation and will be terminated.

Share
twitter facebook
Re:I hope they didn't re-use the Clippy code (Score:2, Funny)

by HD Webdev ( 247266 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @01:58PM (#11835856) Homepage Journal

"It looks like you are trying to go to the bathroom. Would you like help with that?"

"You're reading a Slashdot article about how to hack me and turn me into a sex-slave. Please stop your activities."

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:perspective please (Score:2, Funny)

by lgw ( 121541 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @07:06PM (#11839310) Journal

You had a ROCK? Lucky bastard! I had to walk up hill, both ways, through the snow to get snow, and it melted before I could pretend it was a truck, and I LIKED IT!

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Re:perspective please (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @07:35PM (#11839553)

No I am not!

Oh, wait

Parent Share
twitter facebook
Danger! (Score:3, Funny)

by sPaKr ( 116314 ) writes: on Thursday March 03, 2005 @07:36PM (#11839573)

Danger Will Gates, Danger DANGER!

Share
twitter facebook

There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

Sounds like Awesomo! (Score:5, Funny)

Umm... (Score:5, Funny)

The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

Linux (Score:5, Funny)

Obligatory Bender reference (Score:3, Funny)

Clippy (Score:5, Funny)

Kids nowadays... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:5, Funny)

Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:5, Funny)

Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

In other news (Score:5, Funny)

Um Thats TV's job (Score:5, Funny)

sarah Conner (Score:5, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:4, Funny)

All right! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Linux (Score:5, Funny)

Re:perspective please (Score:5, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

Re:In other news (Score:5, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Just wait... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Clippy (Score:1, Funny)

Just IMAGINE the EULA on this thing! (Score:3, Funny)

he is (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Just IMAGINE the EULA on this thing! (Score:4, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:3, Funny)

The solution for that is... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:5, Funny)

Re:All right! (Score:2, Funny)

Re:agh (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Super Toys Last All Summer Long... (Score:3, Funny)

Robots (Score:1, Funny)

Re:agh (Score:2, Funny)

They are here to protect us... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:They are here to protect us... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:agh (Score:1, Funny)

Re:The horror! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:The horror! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Gate's Laws of Robotics (Score:2, Funny)

Mandatory ... (Score:4, Funny)

Obligatory quote... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:perspective please (Score:5, Funny)

I hope they didn't re-use the Clippy code (Score:5, Funny)

Re:BSOD (Score:2, Funny)

HEADLINE (Score:3, Funny)

Log error message (Score:3, Funny)

Re:I hope they didn't re-use the Clippy code (Score:2, Funny)

Re:perspective please (Score:2, Funny)

Re:perspective please (Score:1, Funny)

Danger! (Score:3, Funny)

Related Links Top of the: day, week, month.

Slashdot Top Deals