What's A 'Scroll Lock' And Why Is It On My Keyboard? 866
Posted
by
timothy
from the mysteries-of-the-ancients dept.
from the mysteries-of-the-ancients dept.
Jeff Bauer writes "Today's article in The Straight Dope explains all
the weird keys that come with standard PC keyboards. Now if someone could just explain what the 'Alt Graph' key does on my Sun keyboard, enlightement would be at hand ..."
real application! (Score:5, Funny)
"In command-line environments such as DOS, the pipe symbol can add functionality to a DOS command. The way I most frequently use it is when doing a directory listing (DIR) on a large directory with hundreds of files. Say I type "DIR" at the command prompt like so:
C:\Una\Lesbian Porn>DIR
. . . then the 22,000 files in that directory scroll past so fast I can't see their names. However, if I apply the pipe function at the command prompt like this:
C:\Una\Lesbian Porn>DIR | more
. . . then the display will show me one screen of files at a time, with a "More" at the bottom. To display the next screen of files, I hit any key to continue, until all of the files in the directory have been listed (or I break, by pressing Ctrl-C). This is similar to using the "/p" modifier, such as "DIR
Not only do they explain it, but give a real life situation where it'd be useful! It's always hard to sort through 22,000 lesbian porn pics.
Windows Key (Score:5, Funny)
Scroll Lock huh? (Score:1, Funny)
An old one (Score:5, Funny)
^"`$$-
!*=@$_
%*<> ~#4
&[]../
|{,,SYSTEM HALTED
Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash,
Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash,
Bang splat equal at dollar under-score,
Percent splat waka waka tilde number four,
Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash,
Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.
Scroll Lock Key (Score:5, Funny)
Props! (Score:5, Funny)
The Light (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Windows Key (Score:1, Funny)
window key (Score:1, Funny)
oh... nevermind.
Re:An old one (Score:5, Funny)
}"_# |
-@$&/_%
!( @|=>
;`+$?^?
,#"~|)^G
hat less at less point at star
backbrace double base pound space bar
dash at cash and slash base rate
wow open tab at bar is great
semi backquote plus cash huh DEL
comma pound double tilde bar close BEL
Outstanding, but... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:real application! (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Or can anyone explain (Score:5, Funny)
It's for annoying the crap out of email recipients and newsgroup readers - of course.
Re:The ` key (Score:5, Funny)
Re:An old one (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Losing the Insert key (Score:4, Funny)
You are not using a modern keyboard.
You are using a Modern Art keyboard.
We used to use backtick an tilde as delimiters in proprietary text storage and parsing routines. Nobody will these when entering text into a program. Well at least that was the theory at design time.
Re:The real question is (Score:3, Funny)
What has this world come to...now you have to call your lawyer and start sueing things just to move your pointer...wtf
Here's an idea (Score:4, Funny)
Re:real application! (Score:5, Funny)
Can Linux do this? If not, Windows is better than Linux.
Windows Key-BKOD. (Score:1, Funny)
It makes Windows bluescreen, STOP HITTING IT!!!
Re:real application! (Score:5, Funny)
No, it requires a mouse.
Alt-Gr (as seen on lusenet) (Score:5, Funny)
(Alt-Gr key example [www.ucd.ie] (in this case being illustrated as part of a key combo to produce the Euro symbol))
Re:scroll lock (Score:2, Funny)
up, down, and ``straight to eleven''.
Re:real application! (Score:3, Funny)
Obligatory... (Score:5, Funny)
Blatanly stolen from Simpsons episode 3f05.
I can't find (Score:5, Funny)
nigerians (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Hmm... (Score:5, Funny)
For all the NetAdmins out there... (Score:3, Funny)
my co-worker, in all the years that he's been working here, never seems to learn this.
i'd be sitting at my desk, trying to do more important stuff (like reading
"there's something wrong with this router! come check it out..."
me: "is the scroll-lock on?"
few seconds later...
"oh."
Re:Losing the Insert key (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Alt -escape (Score:5, Funny)
You're right. The "Windows Key" (AKA Start Button) is CTRL+ESC. The "right-click" is SHIFT+F10. The "Task Manager" is CTRL+SHIFT+ESC. The "Boot a Real OS" is CTRL+ALT+DEL.
Re:An old one (Score:1, Funny)
Re:real application! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Outstanding, but... (Score:5, Funny)
Look no further, Compaq has the answer. [compaq.com]
Re:The ` key (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Mad Props (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Or can anyone explain (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Windows Key (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Losing the Insert key (Score:3, Funny)
I dont have an key. I dont understand whats up with people on Slashdot always griping about my typing and grammar. Its perfectly acceptable. Theres nothing wrong with it. Whatever, I just dont get it.
Re:Losing the Insert key (Score:5, Funny)
My car key, my office key, my desk key,
you're so clever (Score:1, Funny)
As a short list:
1. Repeated extensive capitalization as an indication of vocal volume.
2. Misspelling of "damnit"
3. Incomplete sentences.
4. Use of "Mod" as a verb. (the most similar to the slang you criticize so heavily)
Note that our language is completely jacked already-- to paraphrase your example:
It's BOXEN, goddamnit! OXEN! SHEEP! THIEVES! WOMEN! CHILDREN! MICE! BARRACKS! DICE! ALUMNI! VORTICES! AUTOMATA!
Look! It's a whole slew of plurals that don't follow any consistent rules! It's pretty "twisted" already. Besides, I like "boxen."
Re:The Light (Score:5, Funny)
Pointing at radio tower with blinking red light: "What's that tower for?"
"They built it to warn planes."
Re: Windows Key (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Alt -escape (Score:2, Funny)
just tryed that real OS trick,
and blow me down with a feather
XP is a real OS after all.
Re:real application! (Score:5, Funny)
You're new here, aren't you?
The Straight Dope (Score:3, Funny)
is extremely knowledgeable and cosmopolitan. No urban legends, actual investigation, proper journalistic techniques. Believe me,
Re:real application! (Score:3, Funny)
# umount
umount:
umount:
so maybe umount -f
# umount -f
umount2: Device or resource busy
umount:
umount:
umount2: Device or resource busy
umount:
Nope. Looks like this is a Windows-only feature. I guess Windows must be the more powerful OS...
Re:An old one (Score:2, Funny)
C:
:
###
See colon, enter colon, pound pound pound!
Any Key (Score:2, Funny)
Re:real application! (Score:1, Funny)
Re:The real question is (Score:1, Funny)
No, - my fellow IT-humans! Don?t take away the number keyboard! Better yet, - bring a backup set for all keys on the board.
What do you think?
Re:but (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Scroll Lock Key (Score:5, Funny)
Many thousands of years ago, a new technology brought forth rampant unapproved duplication of holy scrolls. Fearing their power was slipping out of their grip, the religious leadership began a campaign of identifying and stoning to death the worst offenders.
When this campaign backfired, causing people to buy even less scrolls than before, they changed their approach by embedding actual physical protection on scrolls they sold, in an attempt to reduce the illegal duplication and maintain control over distribution.
These "scroll locks" were placed on all scrolls manufactured, and indeed served to protect their power for several decades. But, eventually they were cracked, for it was only a matter of time, and scrolls and their content became free.
The world changed for the better, and people vowed never to let anything like that happen again. As we say now "when pigs fly", they too saw the improbability of ever allowing such a thing to happen again. "Yeah, maybe 2000 years after the Son of God walks the earth, then we'll let this happen again, but not before that!" laughed Haramud Ha'abbahakbar.
And so it was inscribed in many religious texts (rough translation) "And bind upon your keyboards always a key named 'Scroll Lock' so that you may be reminded daily of the plight caused by this wretched behavior of control, and that you may take your child upon your lap and tell him of the horrors forced upon his ancestors in the time when individual men were treated as slaves."
It saddens me that this history is forgotten, and all we can think about is scrolling a spreadsheet or switching monitors. To think that people actually would remove this key frightens me and foretells of a coming apocalypse, as people have foresaken their history and are doomed to repeat it.
Re:Windows Key (Score:1, Funny)
Wouldn't it make more sense with Win+X for right handed and Win+. for left handed people.